FAMILY LAW LITIGATION

When planning for divorce, here are some things to do and keep in mind:

Money / Property

• If you have not yet mentioned divorce, make copies of all financial records prior to announcing you want a divorce.
• After the date of separation, open a new bank account in your name only for your pay to be deposited. Keep all separate earnings separate.
• Change all passwords on important accounts.
• Gather or make copies of important documents. For instance, financial records, tax returns for last five years, and any records of property/investments made during marriage.
• Scan or make copies of important records showing that property/investments were purchased during marriage.
• Likewise, gather documents showing any property/investments purchased after separation with separate property earnings.
• Gather any records showing property you inherited before, during or after marriage.
• Pay attention to the automatic restraining orders and do not violate them.
• If your ex-partner/spouse is lying about money, earnings, business matters or community finances, let your attorney know immediately.

Children

• Gather records for monthly expenses. These include child care, tuition and other school costs, extracurricular activities, medical, insurance, food, entertainment, tutors, etc.
• Scan or make copies of any records.
• Remember your child(ren) are both of you. Therefore, if you criticize the other parent in front of the child, you are criticizing the child.
• Document and gather evidence if the other parent has health, sobriety or other issues impairing their ability to keep children safe in their care.

Other Items When Planning for Divorce

• Change your email password(s) and any other passwords your ex-partner/spouse could easily guess.
• Do not post photographs of yourself with new girlfriends or boyfriends on social media until your divorce is final and no issues are outstanding.
• If your spouse isn’t cooperating with things, log all dates and detail behavior. This includes honoring schedules, being evasive regarding communication/responses, or being combative toward you or your children.
• Save all emails and texts.
• When dressing for court, wear conservative clothing and accessories.
• Avoid confrontational situations involving your ex-partner/spouse.
• Exercise, try yoga or meditation and get outside and experience nature.
• Hiking in the hills or walking on the beach will bring you outside yourself. Remind you of who you were before you met your ex-partner/spouse.
• Being in nature and getting outside will help you traverse the path to your next chapter.
• If you are lonely, join organized activities, volunteer or take up something you always wanted to do.
• Remember divorce is a grieving process. You are likely to be emotional and your judgment may be off. Therefore, be gentle with yourself, get enough rest and eat nourishing food.
• Reach out if you need help.

 

It may be in your best interest to consult with an attorney before you announce that you want a divorce. If you would like our free report on intelligent alternative to traditional divorce litigation, you may download it here. To discuss the details of your specific situation, email us or call us for a consultation at 310.481.0300.